Monday 2 August 2010


This is a common question, “How can you tell if you are moaning?” , but the answer is not always as easy to find. What feels like simple complaining to one person may be nothing more than a spirited way to pass the time in conversation to another. Some people may be driven to whinging at the smallest provocation, while others are more stoic and are slow to enter the fray with a verbal contribution. 

This can be confusing when you are under social or  hor’moan’al pressure. 

Discussing, commenting, complaining or moaning it can all get a little confusing, can’t it?

If you agree with all of these statements then you probably are guilty of moaning:

1 When you told your significant other that you thought you might be moaning they replied with the phrase: “You think?”
2. That special person, when they see you heading their way, with that telling look painted on your face, quake long before you open your mouth to speak
3 The person who has been listening to you has developed, not so much an over-all sparkly glow as a glazed, milky fog.
4 The people who once said they were happy to be a listening ear have now developed earache.
5 Your partner has developed an adorable little facial tick, usually triggered when you say: “I’m not one to moan but...”

Remember, moaning is a feeling best shared with others, particularly those who have a vested interest in seeing you happy. Moaning is not about outcomes or conflict resolution. It has nothing to do with moving you on from here to somewhere better. It is about wallowing, and enjoying the freedom to vent. It should not be tainted by positivity, helpfulness or, worst of all, any kind of constructive input. Moaning is surrendering to your inner child, in the toddler stage, and knowing you are being totally unreasonable. Moaning is done badly if you feel, in any way, uplifted or enlightened.

So, thrusting forthrightness way out of sight, the question remains, how can you tell if you are moaning?


  1. I can tell I'm moaning if the other person is either not saying much, or they change the topic and I get miffed that they no longer want to talk about ~my~ misery!

    - Eric

  2. Hi Eric
    I'd only complain if they forgot to nod their head at most of the right moments ;)

  3. I usually find myself smacking myself and saying "Stop moaning/whining/compalining."

  4. Fun post Elaine - thanks for all those tips to spot the moaning! :)

  5. Hi Lydia
    It says much about the quality of your family and friends that it is you, yourself, who end up delivering the timely clip around the back of the head. ;)

    Hey Jemi
    Help for the hapless? ;)

  6. That kitten picture is priceless! How can I tell if I'm moaning? I get this annoying whiny voice, and it goes up a few decibels and then I quickly stop because I know I must sound terrible. If I could learn to moan in a pleasant voice, with a smile, I'd be okay and could go at it a lot more often.

  7. Hey Karen
    Gotta love a grumpy cat. I figure, dressed in that rabbit suit, he had a lot to moan about.
    Patent the non-whiny moan and you'd make a fortune ;)

  8. I know I'm moaning when I reach for the box of chocolates or cookies. :)

    Cute cat!

  9. Hi Karen
    Snap! Nearly.
    I know I'm moaning when I reach for the chocolates and the cookies! ;)

    The cat is a bit of a star - I think is up-staging my post ;)

  10. "Moaning is done badly if you feel, in any way, uplifted or enlightened." LOL I think I have a tendency to keep my moaning inside!