Friday 28 January 2011

SELENE - NEAR EDGWARE - HOSTS MY NO FEAR BLOGFEST

Dominic is hosting the No fear Blogfest today.Check it out on his Blog, Writes of Passage

 All you have to do is:

"Post a passage in which your MC (or your favourite fictional character) shows their bravery. It might be in the face of physical danger, or peer pressure or personal sacrifice. It might be epic bravery or bravery that goes unnoticed by anyone but us, your devoted readers."

NEAR EDGWARE

The members of the pack don't want Selene to risk exposing them all but after the Caleb is attacked Selene risks the mindless insanity of the turned werewolf when she chooses to go to him. She loves him. She has to try to bring him back from the dark place extreme violence has pitched him. 


“Where is he? Please?”
“He isn’t there," whispered Tedman."He could... he will attack.” 
I shook my head.
His eyes narrowed, “How could we explain the ripping new-you, to your parents, if he hurts you and blood contact affects your DNA?”
 “I have to try.”
Despite Faolan’s support, Mac’s feet dragged as he stepped closer, “How can we allow it?”
 “You have to let me see him. I can reach  ”
Tedman eyes glowed soft yellow, “He won’t let anyone near him. He won’t allow a light. He hasn’t moved, or even spoken since – .”
“Did he speak, after?”  
 “Again and again, but he only said one thing.”  Alburn spoke from the lowest step. His chest was wrapped in bandages but bruises seeped higher across his pale chest and blackened his jaw. There were no tears or bites, but he was a mess.
“His feet,” Alburn answered the unasked question.
“He kept saying: ‘It’s my fault.’"  said Tedman. "He couldn’t hear. He wouldn’t listen.”
“We told him it wasn’t,” added Alburn. “We said he wasn’t to blame for this, but …”
“He was wild. Now he is violent. Lost to us.”
Stumbling past and between them, I made for the stairs.
“Selene?” called Mac, “Where are you going?”
“To the dark.” Using my feet and hands, using as few steps as possible, I climbed to the top of the house.

Ducking under the unhinged door I saw the efforts they’d already made to tidy away the evidence of the attack. The room had been stripped of the damaged things; ghost-images of their possessions stood in the spaces everywhere. But Caleb wasn’t in the room, not on a bed at least. I looked towards the boys’ bathroom, sure now where he was.  
 The door was closed but a ray of sunlight glinted on the brass door handle and the key dangling from the lock. A rumbling growl made me freeze, but it wasn’t deep enough to be Caleb in wolf form. The lock gave a soft snick as I turned the key. Silence gave me the encouragement I needed to tug the handle and to push the door open. Foot hovering over the threshold, I paused when a deeper growl began in the dark of the room.
The others had followed. They were standing behind me talking in hushed whispers, making decisions they planned to enforce.
I gripped a small object tightly in my hand, didn’t waste time trying to argue or to explain. I darted inside and used the key to lock it closed again with two of us inside.
With the cold, tiled floor beneath me, I waited for my eyes adjusted to the half-light. Caleb was damaged and still trapped inside a cage, but this was one he had created in his mind. That didn’t matter. I had to find a way to get through to him, and then I’d be able to help him free himself from this prison too. With images of Alburn and Tedman fresh in my mind I knew the damage Caleb could do. But I had to believe, no matter what, that I could find Caleb, reach him, and survive.
The only sound on the other side of the room was breathing. Sounds that became deeper, more rapid. My heart raced, my breath caught, the smells in the confined space were building to toxic fumes. I ran my hands down the leather of Faolan's  jacket, there was stiff blood on my tracksuit. It sickened me. I staggered to the shower cubical just inside the door and threw the taps on full. Under the slashing water, I stripped off the jacket and allowed the water to sluice away the surface grime. It wasn’t enough. I peeled off the tracksuit. With the torrent pelting at my back, I waited until the water ran cold.
When I closed the cubical door, there was no sign that Caleb had moved. I slipped down to the floor, shivered as the drops of water trailed down my skin. Talking wasn’t going to work unless Caleb was ready to listen. It was too early to try. Tile by chilled tile, I shuffled forward. I ran my fingers around the tiles and along the grooves between. When I recognised every abrasive, scratchy imperfection, I moved closer onto the next tile.
Discordant and off key, too cheerful for my suicidal efforts, I hummed the song Caleb and his brothers had played the first time I'd visited. My mind flooded with memories. I hoped I could help Caleb find them too. 
I made torturously slow progress across the room. Caleb growled each time I tensed to make my move from one square into the next. His silhouette was easy to make-out, now my eyes were used to the dark. He lay by the side of the bath. With each snarl, violent tremors shuddered through him. His eyes were open but they were never still; they gleamed as they tracked the flicker of the strip of light that crept under the door, as I crawled ever closer.
Uncontrollable shivers made my voice break, I whispered, “I’m – cold; Ca-leb?”
I sat by his feet. He was so still. Blinking back tears cleared my blurred vision. Heart pounding, leaping with the rhythm of his breath, I counted forward and backwards from one hundred. I was still unhurt. Caleb hadn’t moved.
I crawled into the space behind him. Running the pads of my fingers as softly as I could along his back I slid my hand around to his chest. I curved my body around his.
He shivered.
Our bodies’ meagre warmth combined, seeped from core to core. I turned my cheek onto his back until I could see the wood panelled ceiling. Following the lines and counting the knots in the wood, I waited for an end, or for something better. Despite the danger, exhaustion won. With my arms around his chest and my forehead pressed to the centre of his back, I fell asleep.

Sorry it is on the long side, but it is my favourite piece of brave writing. I can't wait to read the other actions that take bravery and, maybe, risk life and limb :)

24 comments:

  1. Elaine- I enjoyed this read! I want to know what happens when she wakes up. She was very brave. great post for the blogfest!

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  2. Hi Summer
    New picture! A very out-doorsy look :)
    Thank you. Selene was brave: she'd just witness first hand what mindless Were could do. ;)

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  3. What a fun blogfest! Great segment too. Selene sounds like a really interesting AND BRAVE character. :)

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  4. Hi Ali
    Thanks. I'm glad you enjoyed the segment. I'm Selene's biggest fan ;)

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  5. Nicely written with great description. The build up keeps the reader interested. Selene is brave and a strong character.

    I enjoyed the excerpt.

    Michael

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  6. Hi Michael
    Thank you. It is hard to drop the reader into the story. It is the first time I felt I had to provide a little context. Selene is a little brave here ;)

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  7. Hi,

    Lovely piece of writing, and the closing scene a touching response from Selene! ;)

    best
    F

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  8. Hi Francine

    Like it :) It was very touching ;)

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  9. oooh Love this! Touching and emotional and just all-out cool.

    Also, I'm a sucker for werewolf stories, lol.

    T.x

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  10. I loved this. Selene is very brave and obviously deeply in love with Caleb. I didn't mind the length - I would loved to have read more!

    No Fear Blogfest

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  11. This is a very touching story of love, and the courage you can get from love. Thank you for sharing

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  12. A wonderful piece of writing, I didn't notice the length as I could have read on and on. Selene (love the name) is very brave but also somehow nurturing and trusting. I really like your work.

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  13. Selene is great for the MC, I can just imagine her. Nice excerpt too.

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  14. I connected with Selene. This is a great piece.

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  15. This is really good Elaine - it felt short to me!

    You clearly have the ability to write a real page turner! The pace and tension were spot on - the bravery beyond doubt!

    Well done, and thank you for joining my blogfest :)

    :Dom

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  16. Tessa
    Thank you I love all-out cool. Selene and Caleb would love that idea :)

    Hi Ellie
    Thank you. NEAR EDGWARE was the first ms I finished it has been read in full from the slushpile but sadly it was a case of very nearly taken on. - Bah humbug!

    Hi Tony
    I'm glad you enjoyed this excerpt from Selene and Caleb's story :)

    Hi Margo
    I'm delighted you like my work. This kind of comment gives me the encouragement I need to capture, and craft into words, the stories I've imagined.

    Hi Myne
    Thank you. I'm glad you were able to picture Selene with so little description. She is a great character.

    Hi Medeia
    I'm glad you were able to connect with Selene. She follows her heart.

    Hi Dominic
    I'm glad my excerpt didn't make you snooze. Thank you for your encouragement. I loved taking part in your Blogfest.

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  17. I like your character Selene. This was a great entry in the blogfest. As Dominic said, you have that all-important page turner ability.

    Denise :)

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  18. Hi Denise
    Selene is great - all hidden depths and determination :)

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  19. It didn't seem too long to me either.I agree it has a very touching final scene and the love and the determination against adversity shines though. :O)

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  20. CONGRATULATIONS - you are a finalist in the No Fear blogfest. Voting is open until midnight GMT on Sat 6th Feb
    Thanks for taking part!
    :Dom

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  21. Hi Madeleine
    Thank you for your kind thoughts. (Touching scene - the phrase makes me smile every time ;)

    Hi Dom
    WOW! Thanks for selecting me as a finalist. I'm not sure I can vote for myself, maybe everyone who comes through the Blog might be persuaded to vote. :)

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  22. OK, Elaine, I'll say it once more - very touching scene! And congratulations on being selected as a finalist.

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  23. Gracious. It is very touching and a bit macabre and terrifying all rolled into one. Worthy nominee indeed. Congratz!

    Following! :)

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  24. Hi Botanist
    Thank you :) Being singled out, for the original book idea - the one that really feels like part of the family - is a great feeling. :)

    Hi Mysti
    Wow! A risky kind of bravery, especially when the pack were massing to try to stop her but Selene had already faced Caleb, at his most mindless, and succeeded in helping him.

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